Just. Reach. Out.

The problem with shame is that the more silent you stay, the more shame you draw towards yourself. And the longer you keep the secret, the longer the shame hangs around. Like a noose, waiting for that one final nudge, that pushes you over the edge.

In the words of Brené Brown:
“If you put shame in a petri dish, it needs three ingredients to grow exponentially: secrecy, silence, and judgment."

Oh yes, the judgement! People can be cruel, and they can be quick to pass judgement. NOBODY knows what is happening inside YOUR home, or inside YOUR relationship, or inside YOUR heart, and yet they all have a lot to say.

Close friends turn their backs on you. Instead of offering support, they jump onboard the boat of persecution, and paddle away from you, and you are alone, on an island made of shame and self-hatred.

They all become the professors, the therapists, the relationship gurus, the detectives, the psychics. Why do people do that?

Why do they suddenly all become "experts" when someone else fails or falls down? They are not in YOUR shoes, they have no idea what is happening, and yet they have an opinion. Who the actual f%#k do they think they are?

It’s at this point that you realize you are alone, and you have to make some choices. You realize you have to find a way to survive this.

You have to dig deep and realize that your reason “TO” is stronger than your reason “not to”!

You need to find a way to release the secret and shame you are carrying before it consumes you entirely.
You need to reach out.
You need to find just ONE person.

No f%#K up is worth your sanity, and in some cases, your life.
It actually breaks my heart to even think about that, but it happens.

Just. Reach. Out.

We ALL make mistakes. It’s what we do about them that matters.